Funny Wine Tasting Notes

If you thought you’ve heard it all when it comes to wine-tasting, then you surely haven’t read all the funny tasting notes. we’ve found some on

TASTING NOTE 1: This ruby rich delight is packed with mouth-watering sumptuousness with hints of bramble, blackberry, boysenberry, Don Cherry and Frankenberry flourishes. A treat to open tonight with beef testicles or lamb spleen escabeche. Also an ideal companion for manic-depression. Shows promise to last longer than your belief in an afterlife.

TASTING NOTE 2: Straw yellow colour, reminds of bottles peed in when too lazy to leave the couch. Wafts of apples, pears and armpits on the subway, this one surely won’t disappoint. Break the seal tonight to help you forget you have to repeat the same day tomorrow or save it for next year after you’ve realized anyone can do your job. Good with pork or pancakes, this stunner is ripe for self-medicating any time of day.

TASTING NOTE 3: Dark as David Fincher, this beauty unwinds waves of hovercraft oil, BDSM dungeon sweat and Fair-trade biodynamic hand-cultivated chocolate from a mountaintop parcel of land in a coastal rainforest. A brooding mistress of devilish wonder – uncork it for a seance tonight or pair it with freshly killed goat from a voodoo ritual. This one will make you wonder what you’re doing with your life.


What’s the funniest tasting note you’ve read?


2014 Harvest Report

Article written by Hendrik Myburgh – Viticulturist

At Goudini we are very excited about the 2014 wines.  Relatively cool weather during the growing season resulted in strong vine growth and lots of leaves that produce flavour compounds in the grapes.  Remarkable even colouring of the red berries at verizon was spectacular to see.

Just as temperatures picked up in January and vineyards started struggling, good rainfall occurred and relieved the pressure.  Harvest started about 10 days later than normal and then progressed quickly, with the last grapes received on 3 April.

Total tonnage harvested was 50 ton or 0.2% less than the 2013 harvest.  Overall quality is impressive, with Chardonnay showing strong varietal flavours and good mouth-feel.  Sauvignon Blanc wines show more tropical flavours instead of our usual cut grass / green pepper style.  The biggest improvement is on the red wines though, with lots more colour intensity and nice mouth filling fruit flavours.

The first 2014 harvest Sauvignon blanc wine is already bottled and on the shelves.  The 2014 Chenin Blanc and Unwooded Chardonnay will be bottled in June.  The winemakers are especially pleased with the Chardonnay, already saying that it is in the same league or even better than the highly acclaimed (and accoladed) 2013 Goudini Unwooded Chardonnay.

We are very excited for 2014’s wines!

How to store wine…

Now some of you might wonder why one would want to store wine… But some people prefer to remember a special occasion with a bottle of wine, for example the birth of a child, or a wedding ceremony, or maybe you are just a collector.

Click here to see a perfect example of why one would like to store a special bottle of wine. 

Here are some tips to store wine:

Article from

1. Keep It Cool

Heat is enemy number one for wine. High temperatures higher will age a wine more quickly than is usually desirable. And if it gets too much hotter, your wine may get “cooked,” resulting in flat aromas and flavors.

2. But Not Too Cool

Keeping wines in your household refrigerator is fine for up to a couple months, but it’s not a good bet for the longer term. Also, don’t keep your wine somewhere it could freeze (an unheated garage in winter, forgotten for hours in the freezer). If the liquid starts turning to ice, it could expand enough to push the cork out.

3. Steady as She Goes

More important than worrying about achieving a perfect temperature, is avoiding the landmines of rapid, extreme or frequent temperature swings. Aim for consistency, but don’t get paranoid about minor temperature fluctuations; wines may see worse in transit from the winery to the store. (Even if heat has caused wine to seep out past the cork, that doesn’t always mean the wine is ruined. There’s no way to know until you open it—it could still be delicious.)

4. Turn the Lights Off

Light, especially sunlight, can pose a potential problem for long-term storage. The sun’s UV rays can degrade and prematurely age wine. One of the reasons why vintners use colored glass bottles? They’re like sunglasses for wine. Light from household bulbs probably won’t damage the wine itself, but can fade your labels in the long run. Incandescent bulbs may be a bit safer than fluorescent bulbs, which do emit very small amounts of ultraviolet light.

5. See Things Sideways

Traditionally, bottles have been stored on their sides in order to keep the liquid up against the cork, which theoretically should keep the cork from drying out. If you’re planning on drinking these bottles in the near- to mid-term, or if the bottles have alternative closures (screw caps, glass or plastic corks), this is not necessary. We will say this, however: Horizontal racking is a space-efficient way to store your bottles, and it definitely can’t harm your wines.

6. Not a Whole Lot of Shaking

There are theories that vibration could damage wine in the long term by speeding up the chemical reactions in the liquid. Some serious collectors fret about even the subtle vibrations caused by electronic appliances, though there’s little evidence documenting the impacts of this. Significant vibrations could possibly disturb the sediment in older wines and keep them from settling, potentially making them unpleasantly gritty. Unless you live above a train station or are hosting rock concerts, is this likely to be a problem for your short-term storage? No. (But don’t go shaking your wines like a Super Bowl MVP about to spray a bottle of Champagne around the locker room.)

Read more here

Reasons to drink more wine

We found this great article: “23 Excellent Reasons To Drink More Wine“. Here’s some of the reasons we liked most:

2. Those who drink moderate amounts of alcohol, including red wine, seem to have a lower risk of heart disease.

5. The term “one glass” is always relative.

6. Because wine bottles come with such pretty labels.

7. Wine keeps your memory sharp.

Well, maybe not in the short term (i.e., after four glasses). But a Columbia University study found that brain function declines at a markedly faster rate in nondrinkers than in moderate drinkers.

9. Wine enhances the already lovely flavors of your favorite foods.

(Click here for larger chart.)

 12. Because sometimes adults need sippy cups too.

13. Because you can find wine named after all your favorite desserts.

14. Wine is super portable.

16. You can make a chair out of wine corks!

17. You can fake wine knowledge pretty easily.

19. Because you can’t fill this with beer cans, now can you?

20. Champagne contains about 10 fewer calories per serving than non-sparkling wine and typically comes in a smaller serving size, making it a healthier choice.

21. You can even consume wine in ICE CREAM FORM.

That’s ice cream containing 5% alcohol. Don’t mind if I do!

22. Because you don’t even have to leave the house to get the full effect.

23. Drinking wine can reduce the risk of depression.

study in the BMC Medical journal found that two to seven glasses of wine a week may reduce depression.


Cabernet Sauvignon

We cannot agree more when they say “Cab is king of the red wine grapes”! That’s why we wanted to share these fun facts:

Read the full article here

1. A grape filled with blood, sweet and tears…

Early attempts to grow Cabernet Sauvignon in South Africa did not always have very satisfactory results. Part of the reason for this was that the vines had been planted in areas that were too cool, leading to very bushy vines which had a rather peppery taste. The problem was solved by growing the grapes for longer. The result was sweeter wines with  higher alcohol levels. These vines have now started to age, allowing them to produce larger quantities of intensely-flavoured fruit.

2. South Africa’s second most planted grape

In South Africa, Cabernet Sauvignon is the second-most widely planted variety after Chenin Blanc, making up 12.53% of the total area under vineyard at the end of 2009.

3. When did Cabernet Sauvignon arrive in South Africa?

No record exists to confirm Cabernet Sauvignon’s first arrival in South Africa, but it is likely that the varietal has been here for over 200 years. By the 1920s it had become one of the country’s top-quality red varieties, and today it is grown in virtually all of the country’s wine-producing areas.

Buy our Cabernet Sauvignon here!

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